Let me forewarn you that despite the title of this post, it is not actually about summer. It's the name of a song that will make more sense by the end if you're not familiar with it.
I'm actually writing about boys here. I feel like I may be turning into Taylor Swift a little bit with this whole writing about boys thing.. except for the part where I have absolutely zero musical talent so instead of writing songs that millions of people will buy which will in turn make me filthy rich, I'm just... well... writing. For free. To an audience of about 3. So I guess you win, Swift. You. Win. But whatever.
So.. I started dating again last summer for the first time since my divorce a year and a half ago. And here is how meeting someone in real life went:
"Well hello there, cute man. Oh wait.. nice ring you have there."
"He seems nice. Maybe I'll go talk to him. Oh.. that's a very lovely family you have there, sir."
"Oh, you have a wife also? How nice for you. Carry on then."
Yeah. The number of available men my age is not as promising as it was when I was last in the dating world as a young 20 something year old. So after being talked into it by several different people and actually seeing a few success stories myself, I succumbed to the world of online dating. There. I admitted it. Don't judge me. Anyway, once I got sort of used to the idea, I thought, "It can't be that bad. I'm a perfectly good catch and *I'm* on here. So surely I can find someone that isn't a crazy, stalker pedophile, serial killer.. right?" And you know, I actually did find someone nice fairly quickly. I'm not going to go into much detail about that relationship but we dated for a few months and then it didn't work out. It was nothing like the divorce so I didn't really feel the need to wait to jump back into the dating game. And back online I went. For all of about 6 minutes. Because I remembered that I had much more patience for all of the online nonsense last time than I do this time around. I mean for real. Look for yourself. I'm not revealing anyone's profile identity but these are some of the messages I have gotten..
A mermaid? Really? And it's the first time you've seen one with a beautiful smile? So you've seen others that don't have a beautiful smile??? Where?
I'm not a grammar Nazi by any means but if you can't even spell "goes" right...
You wrote three words and couldn't even write two of them out? Are you really just that lazy?
I guess this guy has a copy and paste method he uses for everyone he talks to and just missed that he already said it to me?
That's nice. But I don't date aliens so that might be a problem..
"Oh, she didn't respond in 30 minutes.. lemme send a smiley to remind her I wrote."
Um, I don't know you so I'm definitely not your sweetie, sweetie. Carry on.
Thanks for your enthusiasm I guess?
Well, since you HAVE to meet me...
Again, I appreciate that you're trying to be complimentary but dude, come on.
If at first, you don't succeed, write again. And again. I mean, I COULD like the stalker type I guess
"I hope your baby is fine?" I don't know what that even means. But ok. Oh wait, that didn't work so let's try to appeal to her spiritual side? I have nothing for this guy...
So there you have it. I'm going to do my own copy and paste with this picture because as arrogant as it may sound, it's just where I'm at right now..
Last weekend, I went out with a couple of girlfriends and I was reminded of how much fun being single can be. We drank, we talked, and we laughed our freaking behinds off for hours on end. It was so much fun. And the added bonus of there being a cute bartender that was actually single and flirted with me didn't hurt either!
So "Summer Girl" is my current anthem and I am going to enjoy it for a while. To save you from having to google the lyrics, here are a couple of lines that refer to what I mean..
"I'm just a summer girl. I wear my flip flops...
Who needs a boyfriend? I got my girlfriends.
And when we get together, the summer never ends"
Flip flops and girlfriends. What else can you ask for?
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