Last week my boys went to Pine Cove Camp at our church. Every single morning that I dropped them off, the counselors were there with this joyful presence, eager to share the love of Jesus with my kids. Every. Single. Morning. There's just something about college students who are on fire for Jesus. It took me back to when I was just a little younger than them and had that same fire. When my days were filled with Crazy Jesus Thursdays in a back room inside the library at my high school, and Wednesday nights were spent at MAD House at my church, and shoe polish was all over my 1993 fuchsia Geo Storm that read, "Honk if you love Jesus!" And falling asleep in the middle of praying happened every single night before I could finish a full prayer because I just had too much to say to my Daddy and I was never ready to stop talking to Him. And I jammed to the lyrics to all of the songs by Audio Adrenaline, Jaci Velasquez, and DC Talk and REALLY meant them as I raised my hands high in the air and truly gave myself over to worship. When my heart broke for the things that broke HIS heart, not my own heart. But in the midst of my tiny view of brokenness, I was still JOYFUL about whose I was and who had ultimate reign no matter what.
But along the way, I began to experience the brokenness of this world on a deeper level. And without even really realizing it, my heart began to harden over the years. Fast forward to today and I can check off so many good things that I have experienced with God through this broken life. Peace? Check. Complete trust in Him? Check. An indescribable gratitude for everything I have been given that I don't deserve? Check. Joyful hope?.... Hmmm... that one seems to have gotten lost somewhere. And I think that's one of the most important pieces missing. Because that is the whole point of Jesus! We talk and complain about the brokenness we see in the world like it's this completely new concept and somehow we need to fix it. But it's not a new concept. We can trace evil all the way back to Adam and Eve. And we. cannot. fix it. There is only one person who can take on that task, and HE. ALREADY. DID. FIX. IT!!! But instead of THAT being the message I live out, I've let myself get caught up in the gloominess that the rest of the world is beating in. I've let myself become of this world with a message of complaint instead of choosing to stand out from it with a message of hope. I complain about this and that happening in the world and in my own life, instead of proclaiming with joy and excitement that Jesus took care of it all already and is still alive and on His throne and doing His good work! I've let the true amazing power of the cross get diminished. How foolish of me!
I remember as a new follower of Christ back in 8th grade, one of my favorite verses was Jeremiah 29:11 that says, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." But for the longest time, I didn't know the full story of Jeremiah, I just knew that one verse and I clung to it because of it's upbeat promise. It was quite some time before I finally decided to read the book of Jeremiah all the way through, and man, was I was disappointed. I didn't read a story of full of upbeat hope, I read a story full of grief. But then I realized that's what makes that verse that I had clung to so awesome. In a story so full of gloom, God is still there offering his promises of hope. The promise means so much more BECAUSE of the gloom it rescues us from! Way back then, God was promising us Jesus. He was redeeming. He is always redeeming. Yes, there is lots of bad in this world, but there is beauty in the middle of it with Jesus. True victory over evil does not lay within us, it lays within Jesus. The power is His and His alone. What is harmful, He makes good again. What is ugly, He makes beautiful again. As much as anyone can try, undoing His perfect plan cannot be done. THE CROSS CANNOT BE UNDONE. "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loves us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any power, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:37-39
How I long for my heart to be refocused on that truth!
My heart still has quite a few hardened layers that still need to be removed, but for right now, I'm focusing on the sweet reminder of the power that is the cross and the glorious hope that it brings. For whoever needs it, I hope that reminder also brings you comfort.
